Pudong Has Changed

It was a Sunday morning. I went to attend the opening ceremony of English Salon （英語沙龍） in Pudong District （上海浦東新區）。 I had been informed about the development in the new area before. So I wanted to enjoy the scenery of it on the way. But to my disappointment， it happened to be heavily foggy that day. Pudong was just like a charming and shy girl who hid herself from view so as not to let people see her real beauty.

　　The ceremony was a great success. Hardly had I entered the meeting room when I was enveloped in an extraordinarily （特別地） warm atmosphere. Many English learners from different middle schools in Pudong and some foreign teachers gathered there. As it was the first English corner in the new area， everyone seemed to be much excited. After introducing each other， we chatted a lot， especially about Pudong. A girl of my age told me that her family had settled down in Pudong years before. She found it much more beautiful now. Two long tunnels （隧道） and two huge bridges connect [connecting] （1） the two parts of Shanghai had [have] （2） been built and the traffic has become more convenient （方便）。 So many department stores， shopping centers and supermarkets have been set up that people can get a wider choice of goods they need. At last she added with a smile：“In our home we enjoy modern comforts such as gas， telephone. People used to say——we would rather have a bed in Puxi（浦西） than own a room in Pudong. But now things have completely changed. I love Pudong more”。 The more she said， the more excited she became. What she said was full of deep confidence and pride in the new area.

　　It was already midday when the ceremony ended. The fog had disappeared and the sun was brightly shining. On my way home， I contemplated（凝眡）the magnificent scenery， recalling the girl's praise of Pudong. She was right， I thought.

　　上海市市三女中 衚畏

　　評 語

　　文章從一個側麪描寫改革開放後的上海浦東，文筆較爲老練，語句運用得較好。如：to my disappointment， it happened to be…，a wider choice of goods， would rather…than…等等。文章中某些語言上的不足之処點評脩改如下：

　　（1）這裡connect應該用現在分詞，做定語。

　　（2）根據上下文看，還是用現在完成時爲好。作者可能想表示在她去浦東前“已經造好”或想表示這是間接引語。其實，在上下文明了，特別是在強調所述情況現在依然如此時用現在完成時反而自然。