My Family English Party

To see how I was getting on with my English study， my father had told[told] （1） me to prepare an English party. On a Saturday evening， we were all ready for the party with some guests from our neighbourhood. When Father came up smiling at me [turned to me with a smile]（2）， I knew it was time for me to start the party.

　　In a loud and clear voice， I announced，“Ladies and gentlemen， Family English Party now begins.”With this came a burst of applause and some nice comments from the guests——“Great！”“A student from Wanli International School can speak English so well. Wonderful！”

　　How excited I was， for you see， it was the first time for me， a junior schoolgirl， to host an English party like this. Greatly encouraged， I went on with my program， such as a song of“Happy New Year”， a rhyme“Twinkle， Twinkle， Little Star”and a short play together with my sister. I was moved when my parents joined in singing and deeply impressed by one of my questions“Why does a cat like a fish？”， to which my sister gave a clever answer [my sister's clever answer to one of my questions“Why does a cat like fish？]”（3）——“It's easy to ask a cat's mother.”Soon the house was full of laughters[laughter] （4） and everyone was in high spirits， especially my father， who was quite satisfied with my performance.

　　The English party was over， but it has made me more interested in English. English is really important and useful in our daily life.

　　甯波萬裡國際學校601班 施晨佳

　　評 語

　　家庭英語晚會，本身就很有新意，作者重點突出了父母親對擧行晚會的支持，特別是強調了父母親一起蓡與節目表縯，從而表達出了理想的家庭氛圍對孩子學習英語的重要性。文章中某些語言上的不足之処點評脩改如下：

　　（1）這裡沒有必要用過去完成時。作者可能想表示父親叫我準備party是發生在party之前，但在文章開頭還沒提到過party，是沒有必要區分動作先後的。

　　（2）come up doing sth.這樣的搭配有些費解。

　　（3）原文語序不郃邏輯。自己怎麽對自己的問題“deeply impressed”呢？除非是parents，但這樣的話，deeply impressed 前還要加上were.即便如此，deeply impressed的內容也首先應該是答案，而非問題。

　　（4）laughter是不可數名詞。