Football and Me,第1張

Football and Me,第2張

As is known, football as a sport is getting more and more popular, and it is loved by people around the world, tall and short, fat and thin, old and young.

  If you ask me what I think of football, I can tell you: I love nothing more than football.

  To tell you the truth, I have been a football fan for more than five years though I am only 15 years old. I did not understand why so many football fans were madly [mad] (1) about football until I became a football fan [one of them myself] (2) .

  Recently I watched World Cup (世界盃)。 Many football stars displayed their skills to the full. I admired for [admired] (3) their wonderful skills. It is obvious that it's [it was] (4) a high level World Cup. In the end, Brazil team got the gold medal, which I think it deserved (應得到)。

  In this World Cup, the best football star, in my opinion,was Christman although the winner was not the Germany team. That's why I have given myself an English name——Aaron Christman.

  I not only watch football matches but also play football. I often spend my spare time playing football with other. I hear of [hear] (5) that a football tournament(錦標賽) will be held in my school pretty soon. If so, I will take an active part in it so that our class team will get the championship.

  Oh, football, I'll love you for ever.

  上海市崇明縣三烈中學高一(1)班 沈慶豐

  評 語

  有人歎息道:中國足球真像一場難圓的夢。但令人訢慰的是,現在已有越來越多的人(包括衆多的中學生)開始關心、熱愛足球。本文表現的就是這樣一個中學生球迷的心聲。從語言角度講,文章寫得較爲流暢,短語、從句使用也較貼切。文章中某些語言上的不足之処點評脩改如下:

  (1)這裡應該用形容詞mad.

  (2)改後避免重複,加上myself使表達更爲有力。

  (3)這裡admire應該是及物動詞。

  (4)原文時態用錯了。

  (5)hear of後接名詞,如:Have you ever heard of such a thing?但後接that從句時,無需用介詞of.

位律師廻複

生活常識_百科知識_各類知識大全»Football and Me

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